Dear God, my prayers are not right, my love for you is fake. I love you for the sake of myself. I do not love you for the sake of you. I had been clinging onto you always, and it is because I always wanted something. I'm telling you very truly, I don't know to love you.

My dear lord, please teach me to love. Please teach me to surrender. Please teach me all these so that I can get back to you... My permanent abode. I'm ignorant. Guide me to the light. Only you can do that. I am weak. Make me strong and help me dear Lord....

 Please give me freedom.... Give me the light/.... The way to the ultimate. Guide me through this darkness. Guide me oh lord.. I feel left alone. Please stay with me and help me

Red Pill or the Blue one...

"This is your last chance. After this there is no turning back.

You take the blue pill- the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill- you stay in wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes.

I know you are out there. I can feel you now. I know that you are afraid... You are afraid of the change.

I don't know the future, I didn't come here to tell you how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it's going to begin"

The words of Morpheus are echoing in my ears. Oh God.... I am in the same state as Neo. But a lot more confused than him. He was in the movie. But I am in "real" life. (Still don't know if it is real).

Neo.... How did you choose the red one!!!

Sometimes, I think I will take the blue one. But, the life will have nothing in it.

All the more confused than ever before. If I take the red pill, I get closer to you. And if its the blue one... I get back in my bed and thinking that it was all a dream. As once you said, that which is strong from within will surpass all the difficulties.

But, there's a force in me asking me to do this........

Standing Alone

The courage to stand alone is to be developed by the sincere seekers of God. He had send us here to learn such a hard lesson, that cannot be learned in a group. The more you get the courage to stand alone, the more you get closer to HIM. 

The Lord is such a powerful light, that once you get a glimpse of it, you will be guided far towards HIM from this darkness filled world. The men out here boasts of their money, fame, caste, religion and so on. Very few do realise that these are all maya. Stand alone firmly and with full courage to help yourself get closer to HIM.

Give me strength

Oh God,
This journey is so difficult. The path that I have chosen is full of difficulties. I knew this before also, but the reality is very hard. To face this reality, am I strong enough? I am still not sure of this....

Feeling of lonliness

The almighty gives you several chances to get closer to HIM. But very rarely do we realize that these were chances. When a sad feeling embrace us, we get disturbed. And the thought that often lingers in our mind is, "Oh why did HE do this to me. The lord doesn't love me at all. That's why he gives me so much of pain." Rarely do we understand that this was a chance, a golden opportunity to get more closer to him.

I remember hearing a story at a chapel when I was studying in the 12th standard. A story that really touched my heart. It goes like this... "A rope stays in between you and God, one end held by you and the other end by God. A rope that goes into two pieces when you get hurt, or is terribly disturbed. You loose hope and curse the holy father for putting you in such a situation. But the moment you realize that you have no one else other than your holy father, the next thing you do is to tie the rope firmly and tightly to get in connection with the Lord. You would be crying out to the Lord to help you. In due course of time, you will feel happy and you find yourself smiling. The crux of the story come now. After having tied your two pieces of rope, have you realized one thing? You got closer to God. Each time you do that, you get nearer to HIM. And at the end, there wouldnt be a gap between the two of you. Thats the time when the holy father will embrace you. And keeps you in HIS arms thereafter."

I'm really happy for the bad days that HE gives me. It is definitely an opportunity for me to get closer to HIM. And I dont curse the sadness or lonliness that fills me now. I know, this is a golden opportunity and he will embrace me and take me in HIS arms very soon.

Liberation

Oh the mighty divine.... where have you left me? Guide me to Thee..

Are you ready?

Something flashed through my mind while I walked towards the light... Am I ready for it? To get the answer, I need to find answer to other questions... Who am I? And how come I'm here? Why was I put in darkness for quite a long time. Have I ever tried to get out this darkness before? 

Well, I can get the answers of these queries, if I can clearly say who I am... Exploring into my thoughts and self to get a better view of me... ultimately to get one answer... "aham brahmahsmi"